It didn’t – making it of no interest whatsoever. Indeed, the film’s only possible point of interest was whether its pre-Oscar US release would nix (or “ Norbit”) Moore’s chances of winning a statuette. The action lumbers hither and yon through endless cod-gothic 3D CG set pieces, but to no avail. The cast assembled is really quite brilliant. Meanwhile, apprentice spook Tom ( Narnia’s Ben Barnes) makes saucer-eyes at Vikander’s witchy temptress, who is introduced in a scene stolen directly from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Aside from all of the primary players (minus Game of Thrones actor Kit Harrington who likely gets no more than fifteen minutes of screen time yet was still ranked high in the billing), Olivia Williams (A&E’s Emma, Miss Austen Regrets) plays Tom’s mysterious mother and Djimon Hounsou a creepy assassin. A bewhiskered Bridges “argle-wargle-fargles” his way through the incoherent dialogue as a medieval “spook” locked in eternal combat with Moore’s she-devil, who fails to be either alluring or interesting despite a nice line in feathery collars and the ability to turn into a flying lizard. Instead, it lingered in post-production hell before tanking spectacularly in America. This dull-as-ditchwater fantasy romp from Sergei Bodrov, director of Mongol: The Rise to Power of Genghis Khan, was intended to launch a lucrative sword-and-sorcery franchise based on Joseph Delaney’s fantasy novel series The Wardstone Chronicles. Ben Barnes (Chronicles of Narnia, Stardust) plays the son of the seventh son Tom Ward, Alicia Vikander (Anna Karenina, A Royal Affair) plays Alice, Olivia. Y ou have to admire a movie which takes a gold-star cast (Julianne Moore, Jeff Bridges, Alicia Vikander) and creates such an unpolishable turd.
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